I don’t know how to say this kindly, so I’ll just spit it out: Some people appear to be under the impression that Timothée Chalamet and Kylie Jenner are dating. A recent rumor courtesy of DeuxMoi, where chaotic celebrity gossip goes to thrive, suggests that our backless heartthrob is getting free lip kits. Which begs the question: Is everyone okay?
Unlike the case of another ungodly Kardashian couple who shall not be named, there is absolutely no proof that this alleged “relationship” is real. On Thursday, DeuxMoi posted an anonymous tip that claimed “multiple sources have told me that Timmy C has a new girl…Kylie Jenner. ⚰️⚰️.”
“⚰️⚰️” is correct. DeuxMoi posted a few follow-ups, all from anonymous sources who claimed to confirm this truly unfathomable rumor, with one contributor saying the two have been dating since at least Paris Fashion Week and another claiming they’re going to Coachella together. Also potentially supporting this theory: According to “Page Six,” Kylie and Timmy were both present at a large group dinner with (sorry) Kendall Jenner and Bad Bunny in addition to Zack Bia and Russell Westbrook.
Even considering the possibility of this relationship has broken me in mind and spirit. I’d previously thought these two exist in entirely separate galaxies of Hollywood, orbiting around their respective suns (Kris Jenner and Tilda Swinton) but never intersecting. Is this what Timmy meant when he said that societal collapse is in the air? I can’t help but suspect that, much like Cats, this jarring combination of famouses is a harbinger of something terrible.
I’m not alone in this feeling. Timmy’s biggest fan, the internet, has reacted to the gossip with appropriate distress:
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